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Not paddling related, but funny!

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  • #784
    windowshade
    Participant

    >
    >
    >
    >
    > Now that Vancouver has won the chance to host the
    > 2010 Winter Olympics
    > these are some questions people the world over are
    > asking!!!! Believe it
    > or not these questions about Canada were posted on
    > an International
    > Tourism Website (frightening, isn’t it!)
    >
    > Obviously the answers are a joke; but the questions
    > were really
    > asked!!!!!.
    >
    > Q: I have never seen it warm on Canadian TV, so how
    > do the plants
    > grow?(UK)
    >
    >
    >
    > A. We import all plants fully grown and then just
    > sit around and watch
    > them die.
    >
    >
    >
    >
    >
    > Q: Will I be able to see Polar Bears in the street?
    > (USA)
    >
    > A: Depends on how much you’ve been drinking.
    >
    >
    >
    >
    >
    > Q: I want to walk from Vancouver to Toronto-can I
    > follow the Railroad
    > tracks? (Sweden)
    >
    >
    >
    > A: Sure, it’s only Four thousand miles, take lots of
    > water.
    >
    >
    >
    >
    >
    > Q: Is it safe to run around in the bushes in Canada?
    > (Sweden)
    >
    > A: So it’s true what they say about Swedes.
    >
    >
    >
    >
    >
    > Q: It is imperative that I find the names and
    > addresses of places to
    > contact for a stuffed Beaver. (Italy)
    >
    >
    >
    > A: Let’s not touch this one.
    >
    >
    >
    >
    >
    > Q: Are there any ATM’s (cash machines) in Canada?
    > Can you send me a list
    > of them in Toronto, Vancouver, Edmonton and Halifax?
    > (UK)
    >
    > A: What did your last slave die of?
    >
    >
    >
    >
    >
    > Q: Can you give me some information about hippo
    > racing in Canada? (USA )
    >
    >
    >
    >
    > A: A-fri-ca is the big triangle shaped continent
    > south of Europe.
    > Ca-na-da is that big country to your North…oh
    > forget it. Sure, the
    > hippo racing is every Tuesday night in Calgary. Come
    > naked.
    >
    >
    >
    > Q: Which direction is North in Canada? (USA)
    >
    > A: Face south and then turn 180 degrees Contact us
    > when you get here and
    > we’ll send the rest of the directions.
    >
    >
    >
    > Q: Can I bring cutlery into Canada? (UK)
    >
    >
    >
    > A: Why? Just use your fingers like we do.
    >
    >
    >
    >
    >
    > Q: Can you send me the Vienna Boys’ Choir schedule?
    > (USA)
    >
    >
    >
    > A: Aus-tri-a is that quaint little country bordering
    > Ger-man-y, which
    > is…oh forget it. Sure, the Vienna Boys Choir plays
    > every Tuesday
    >
    > night in Vancouver and in Calgary, straight after
    > the hippo races. Come
    > naked.
    >
    >
    >
    >
    >
    > Q: Do you have perfume in Canada? (Germany)
    >
    >
    >
    > A: No, WE don’t stink.
    >
    >
    >
    >
    >
    > Q: I have developed a new product that is the
    > fountain of youth. Can
    > you sell it in Canada? (USA)
    >
    > A: Anywhere significant numbers of Americans gather.
    >
    >
    >
    >
    >
    >
    > Q: Can you tell me the regions in British Columbia
    > where the female
    > population is smaller than the male population?
    > (Italy)
    >
    > A: Yes, gay nightclubs.
    >
    >
    >
    >
    >
    > Q: Do you celebrate Thanksgiving in Canada? (USA)
    >
    >
    >
    > A: Only at Thanksgiving.
    >
    >
    >
    >
    >
    > Q: Are there supermarkets in Toronto and is milk
    > available all year
    > round?(Germany)
    >
    > A: No, we are a peaceful civilization of Vegan
    > hunter/gathers. Milk is
    > illegal.
    >
    >.
    >
    >
    >
    > Q: I have a question about a famous animal in
    > Canada, but I forget its
    > name. It’s a kind of big horse with horns. (USA)
    >
    > A: It’s called a Moose. They are tall and very
    > violent, eating the
    > brains of anyone walking close to them. You can
    > scare them off by
    >
    > spraying yourself with human urine before you go out
    > walking.
    >
    >
    >
    >
    >
    > Q: Will I be able to speak English most places I
    > go? (USA)
    >
    >
    >
    > A: Yes, but you will have to learn it first.
    > <img loading=” title=”Very Happy” />

    #15139
    C1-Etienne
    Participant

    Haha thats pretty good,
    Id be interested in seing some of the suff canadians have asked about ther own contries though.
    <img loading=” title=”Very Happy” />

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